This week has been filled to the brim with things to do. Zoe’s high school friend Barb came to visit for a few days and I was busy grading final papers and ensuring that once again I was able to get my final grades submitted on time. While I knew there were other projects waiting to be worked on, the time demands on them were not as pressing as getting my grading done. However, now that I am done with my grading, I feel the need to just crawl into bed and take a nap.
There is a part of me, which feels as if now I should begin working on my next project. At the same time, there has been a part of me, which has been feeling as if it is time to lie down and take a nap. As I sat here and argued with myself, I received this message from God, an application on Facebook, that said “To make a big decision, give yourself time and space away from the mundane so that the sacred can emerge.” If I were paying attention, I would have taken this as a sign to back away from the computer and relax. However, it was not until my bones started aching, my stomach started cramping, and I was experiencing chills throughout my body that I gave myself permission to back away from the workload.
So I lay down, piled under the blankets, asking a few friends for healing energies, and decided to take a nap. If I were meant to go out tonight to experience a sacred global ceremony, I would be feeling better. However, when I woke up I was still feeling awful, so I stayed home. Sometimes my body makes it clear to me what it needs and when. Tonight, it was stay in bed and sleep. After waking up and having some soup and leftover potato, I am feeling like I should lie back down to have the kind of meditative nap I had wanted to take earlier. so naptime it is because for me it is that time when I am in a deep sleep that the Spirit speaks most clearly to me and gives me the words and guidance I need at that point in my life.
I think that is because it is when I am asleep that my hands and brain are empty and all the noise in my life has been centered. I am fully available to the Infinite and always wake up with a clearer vision of what I am to do with my day. It is in these moments that I remember I am in my most vulnerable state, like when I was born, my life and mission are not distracted by the needs and demands of others, but my spirit and my hands were empty to be filled by the Infinite.
One of the things I learned during this naptime was the importance of taking better care of me and remembering that I am not superwoman. Grading frenzy week is always stressful and in the midst of it, I have to remember to take time to unwind, relax, and take care of myself. I have to be intentional about practicing self-care just as I suggest others take care of themselves. I did better this year at pacing things out and staying calmer and less stressed then I have in years past. However, my body seems to have held on to some of the stress and now is in the process of releasing it.
So, as I lay back down to rest, I am going to remember to give thanks to my body for all the hard work it has performed the past 56 years. I am going to ask the Infinite to remove the stress, which I can feel stored in my body and allow it to flow out and be replaced by peace and relaxation. It is only when this is done that I will have the clarity I need to begin on the next project. Until then it’s naptime with the Infinite and me. Night!