The choices for today were:
1. Read the following ideas and write down an affirmation for yourself to help you stay in present time. For example, “I love the wee that grows through the cracks” can be changed to “I grow where I need to grow. Today is my day for growth.”
a. Gentleness is a force in life
b. We all have dark days of fear and doubt.
c. I think of the past and the future and today.
d. I don’t want to whine.
e. How can I be helped when there is so much suffering.
f. The present is a mix of the past and future hopes.
2. Do a kind act and write about it.
3. Put on a raincoat and dark glasses and listen in on a conversation just enough to get a sense of what they are saying. Use streaming to see what the subject of emotional content mean to your life today. Listen again and write again include your intuitive feelings. What are you learning about yourself?
Hmm, I am sitting here wondering if I have done anything kind today. I am sure I have, but that I am not even aware of it is interesting. When I asked my wife if I did anything kind for her today, as she is the only I have seen, she looked at me like I am crazy. She said, hmm, well obviously you have kept me on track with my school work and kept me out of panic city and that in and of itself is worth a lot of money. When I stopped and thought more about it, I began to see all the little things I do each day not just for my wife, but for our kitties, friends, clients, students, etc. I guess it is just such an inherent part of who I am that I am not always mindful of it anymore. So am I not mindful of it because it is not the present, this morning is the past, or am I just not being present. Zoë can get pretty stressed and off track with her studies, and so she asked me to put a daily schedule together for her as I am the just do it gurl. To help her stay focused, I also put approximately lengths of time to complete a task. I, personally, thought it was a little controlling, but it makes her feel loved that I take the time to help her stay on track and now week five in the semester, she is on track with her homework, readings and projects. This is a huge difference from last semester, which we both committed would never happen again. Nobody was happy. Nobody. But even in the midst of that end of semester frenzy, I strove to be loving and kind in my interactions with her and others.
When I think about doing something kind for Zoë, it makes me smile inside and out. Being kind to her is like breathing. I take so much joy out of doing something to brighten her day. I love watching her face as she enjoys a home cooked meal. Sometimes I can literally feel my heart filling up as I am sharing love with someone. It is as if I am fulfilling my mission in life. Sometimes my acts of kindness are spontaneous, but sometimes they are planned. Like Monday, I am meeting with my spiritual companion Margot who is kind enough to come to me during these wintry months. My gift to her is a hot bowl of homemade soup. There is something about sharing a meal together. There is a sense of community and a sharing of not just a meal, but a sharing of love. And on these cold wintry days, a warm bowl can feel so good when you are holding it and the heat of the soup can warm you from the inside out.
But right now, my act of kindness is going to be to me. I am going to curl up in bed, experience the warmth of the covers and the softness of the pillows, and allow the Creator to speak to me in these silent moments we share together. Night world! Hello, Creator.