Week 7, Day 2 – Friendships and Family

The choices for today were:

1.                  Write down the times you have felt a spiritual connection with a friend. What brings this sense out in you? Give examples. Write about the fantasy friends in your life and what they represent? Also, notice to whom you respond in books and movies. Write what that says about you.

2.                  Ask a friend to tell you what she likes best about you. Ask this friend to give you some comments on what you need to do. Use streaming to explore what it was like to ask and on the comments, you received.

3.                  Tell someone what knowing them has meant to you.

4.                  List your friends and how you find yourself in them.

Hmm, so many choices. Where do I start? So I decided to ask several people I know in different contexts what they like best about me and to comment on what I need to do. In response to what they like best about me, they said:

  • You are a peaceful spirit. You are funny. You are amazingly articulate and yet speak to people from a people place. I love that you are so willing to listen.
  • I like you optimistic personality
  • I like that you are non-judging, and that you tell me what I need to hear not what I want to hear. When I ask you about things in life, you always ask questions in return to get to the bottom of the feeling. Often it is frustrating for me, but because I have trust in you as a friend that you are going to give me the advice I need to hear I continue to answer those questions. We often go through life asking those around us questions for them to tell us what we want to hear, and we go to these people to feel better. I have learned from previous discussions with you that I continue to talk to you and ask questions of you because you do not judge, but you also don't bullshit you tell me the "raw truth.”
  • What do I like best about you: your spirit, your heart and your honesty
  • The thing I like best about you is your sweet nature. You are probably one of the sweetest and even natured people I know. Even when people are being bitches, you know. I would be like where is my machete, you are sweet natured and that is one of the traits I find most endearing.

In response to what I need to do, they said:

  • You need to get busier being Sharon, diligently, brilliantly you!
  • I would like to see you become as healthy as you would like to become.
  • I think you need to invest more time for yourself and doing things with yourself, I see you doing so much for others, but only taking occasional time out for your self (I think I should also take this advice lol)
  • I would like to see you protect your heart
  • You have gotten a lot better at it, but taking care of yourself. Being a little catlike, putting some of your needs before those of others.

It was somewhat strange to put this question out there, but the responses made me feel so loved and warm inside. I try to make everything I say a message of love in this world, so to hear that it was these very traits that people liked most about me, made me feel as if the universe was just reflecting back to me some of the energy I was putting out there. I could also feel there love for me in the things they would like to see me do. That was to take care of me. One of the themes I heard was that they would like to see me give to myself in the same way I give unto others. I did find myself wanting to go but I am taking care of myself because I am doing a much better job at it then I had been before. Sometimes I think it is because people do not see me taking that me time or doing the things that feed me and keep me centered and connected to spirit. Like writing these journals may seem like I am doing something for someone else, but they are really for me. If they help someone else along the way, bless it, but they are really for me. My journaling is a gift to me. Cooking is something I do for me. It makes me feel so connected to spirit. Does it make others feel happy – sure, but I am not always cooking just for them. It does something for me as well. Sometimes when I sleep in that is for me as well. The one thing it really got me thinking is what I do for me. I can own that there was a point in time in my life when I was not good at taking care of me and I had to do some real healing around that because I came to a place where I was not taking care of me and thus I was allowing others not to take care of me either. Sometimes I just love to sit in the shower. That might seem crazy, but showering for me is this intensely spiritual experience and I do not want to come out until the water is cold. Napping too is a spiritual experience. It is this state where I am so quiet and still and can really connect with the Creator. This may not sound like fun to some people, but it is to me. I am a very simple person in some respects, and so I find my joy and love in the simplest things in life. I guess I just don’t share those moments with my friends often enough. Nor do they understand or get what a blessing time with them is for me. Maybe I need to tell them that.