Thank you Ghandi!

This morning began like any other morning until I turned the page on my calendar. Then I began reading my quote for the day from Mohandas Ghandi, which read, “If you do not find God in the next person you meet, it’s a waste of time looking for him further.” I had to sit with this one for a while because it brought me back in time to when I was taught this lesson before. I wish I could remember who it was or what it was that taught me that I must look for the Divine in every person I meet. I think it was related to a lesson I learned while reading The Mastery of Love by don Miguel Ruiz who reminded me that if I cannot love everyone unconditionally, then I cannot love anyone unconditionally. It is a similar lesson. If I cannot see the Divine in someone, then I have to spend more time with them and look deeper into who they are to see the light hidden within them.

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Filling the Hole

This morning I was reading a devotional by Iyanla Vanzant about the holes in our life. She asked us to consider how or if we filled the holes. It got me thinking about all the holes I have experienced in my life and how you have helped me to climb out of them and then fill them with love and positive energy. It also got me thinking about all the lessons I have learned about myself in the process of climbing out of them.

One of the holes that I have been dealing with most recently was the hole that was created when I was five years old and had a traumatic experience while having blood drawn. I cannot remember how many times they tried to draw blood, but what I do remember was that with each failed attempt I became increasingly terrified, which made it even harder for them to draw the blood.

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In the quiet of the morning

It is scary when you find yourself telling others exactly what you need to tell yourself. Makes you go hmm, ok God are you having her say this so I can tell myself what I need to hear. A friend of mine from the Whole Living Community was talking about not being productive because she had taken too much time for herself this past weekend and not gotten her normal weekend chores done. As I was writing to her, I found myself convicting myself especially when I realized it had been weeks since I had claimed the time to write in my own journal. Here this private space that is just for me to write my own meanderings about me. And then I remembered that one of my promises to myself had been to take time for me everyday. So when did I start agreeing that I was not worthy of paying myself with some personal time for me. Not Sharon the professor, the mother, the partner, the spiritual director, the sister, or any other role I play for people, but just me.
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